Unhappy or Failed Polygamy: Who's to Blame?

Ever heard of unhappy or failed polygamy? What factors contribute to this? How can one navigate polygamy wisely and patiently? Dive into this article for the answers.

Polygamy, permitted in Islam, doesn't always unfold smoothly. Numerous factors can lead to unhappy or failed polygamous marriages. So, who bears responsibility?

Unjust or Unprepared Husbands

One factor contributing to failed polygamy is an unjust or unprepared husband. An unjust husband fails to provide equitable rights to his wives – be it financial support, attention, time, or treatment. An unprepared husband lacks the knowledge, financial means, or mental readiness for polygamy. Such a husband might enter polygamy for misguided reasons, driven by a desire to display machismo, external pressure, or sheer lack of self-awareness.

Uncontent or Impatient Wives

Another factor is discontent or impatience among wives. A wife who resists polygamy and rejects her husband's decision is uncontent. An impatient wife struggles to control her emotions, acts selfishly, or seeks dominance. External provocations, lack of education, or other reasons can influence wives' discontent or impatience.

Second Wives' Lack of Wisdom or Discipline

The third factor involves second wives lacking wisdom or discipline. A second wife lacking wisdom may provoke the first wife, aim to replace her, or disregard her rights. A undisciplined second wife disobeys her husband, neglects agreed-upon rules, or fails to appreciate what she has. This behavior may stem from mental unpreparedness, lack of knowledge, or deficient moral character.

The Divine Decree

Despite meticulous preparation and correct execution, polygamous marriages may still fail. This can be attributed to the omnipotent divine decree, with Allah knowing what is best for His servants. As stated in the Quran:

"When they are divorced, Allah enriches each [of them] from His abundance. And ever is Allah, over all things, competent and wise." (Quran 4:130)

In such instances, both parties should maintain good conduct throughout the marriage journey. As Allah advises:

"And when they have [nearly] fulfilled their term, either retain them according to acceptable terms or part with them according to acceptable terms. And bring to witness two just witnesses from among you and establish the testimony for [the acceptance of] Allah. That is instructed to whoever should believe in Allah and the Last Day. And whoever fears Allah - He will make for him a way out." (Quran 65:2)

In essence, polygamy can be likened to the emergency exit on an airplane, crucial under specific conditions. However, not everyone can open it; only specific individuals under specific circumstances. May this article broaden your perspective, promoting a more objective assessment of polygamy without solely blaming husbands or wives. Amen.

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