A hug may seem like a small thing, but in reality, it has many benefits that can be gained. Not only does it provide a sense of security, but it can also transfer courage and independence to children.
It can be said that a hug is one of the forms of affection in the form of physical touch that is easy to do. This is why parents need to make hugging a part of their daily routine.
Unfortunately, even though it is relatively easy, not all parents are accustomed to hugging their children.
If parents do not get used to hugging their children since they were young, it is no wonder that they feel uncomfortable or even embarrassed when hugged as adults.
Usually, fathers are the ones who are not used to giving hugs to their children. According to Melly Puspita Sari, S.Psi., MT, NLP, it could be that fathers who find it difficult to hug are also rare to be hugged when they were young. "Because the father grew up and developed without much hugging, he will do the same to his children. But if he is used to being hugged, he will also hug his children," said the psychologist who graduated from Muhammadiyah University of Malang.
Results of several studies, as explained by the author of 'The Miracle of Hug,' show that hugs between parents and children can increase brain intelligence, stimulate the release of oxytocin hormones that provide a sense of calm in children, and have a positive impact on children's development. Equally important, hugs from both father and mother make children feel loved and appreciated.
Moreover, a hug from parents can transfer extraordinary things to children. Each will transfer certain traits to children, so that children will grow and develop into healthy and confident individuals.
A father's hug can actually transfer the ability to be independent. A father transfers the aspect of courage to interact with authority figures outside the home. These children will be stronger when outside the home. Conversely, children who experience domestic violence tend to become timid when outside the home.
Meanwhile, when a mother hugs, the trait of empathy will be channeled to the child. The mother is an affectionate figure, who when the child is sick, will care for and hug the child to provide comfort.
So, if you are not yet accustomed to it, let's start getting used to giving warm hugs to your children. So that they grow up to be loving, intelligent, and independent individuals.
The Islamic Law of Hugging and Kissing Children
Hugging and kissing a child is a natural expression of love and affection. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) set an example of this by lovingly embracing and kissing his grandchildren.
According to a narration by Abu Hurairah, the Prophet (peace be upon him) kissed his grandson, Hasan bin Ali, in the presence of Al-Aqra bin Habis At-Tamimi, who remarked that he had ten children but had never kissed any of them. The Prophet (peace be upon him) then replied, "He who does not show mercy to others, will not be shown mercy" (reported by Al-Bukhari 5997 and Muslim 23).
Similarly, Anas bin Malik reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) hugged and kissed his son, Ibrahim (reported by Al-Bukhari 1303 and Muslim 2315).
These authentic hadiths indicate that it is a recommended practice to show love and affection to children by hugging and kissing them, regardless of their gender.
However, it is important to note that such physical affection should be driven by love and compassion, not by any improper desires. According to the consensus of scholars, any physical contact driven by lust, whether it is from a father or someone else, is strictly prohibited.
In the book Al-Fathu, it is mentioned that the Prophet's (peace be upon him) response to Al-Aqra in the aforementioned hadith is a sign that hugging and kissing a child, whether related or not, should be motivated by love and affection, not desire.
0 Comments